Overheard Conversation No. 66

(Man to barmaid in village pub.)

"You're looking very 'Kill Bill' tonight Karen."

Overheard Conversation No. 89

(Phone conversation on train.)

"No I can’t, no I know what you mean. He just wants... he’s...

Well I’ve always said that, I think he’s a puff to be honest wiv ya.

Yeah but he’s 50. All them young girls after him, don’t you fink?"

Overheard Conversation No. 262

(A pub on a Saturday afternoon. A young woman is standing at the bar next to a much older man. There is a strong smell of roast dinners.)

Man: "Your perfume smells just like Cornish pasties."

Woman: "Ha, yeah... maybe I should get a new one."

Man: "Noo, that one's good, it says 'Come eat me!!'" (Man makes twist-like dance gesture with his arms)

Woman: "Haha." (backing away)

Overheard Conversation No. 139

“I’m considering taking a course in the same building as the Architecture students. What I need is a nice handsome Architect.”

“Mark’s a nice handsome Architect.”

“He’s an Architect.”

...

“Maybe you should give him a chance. You never know what might be lurking beneath that mild-mannered exterior.”

“Yeah, and you never know what could be living in that beard. I’ve tried, I really have. He’s a lovely guy, but there’s no spark. I just can’t be attracted to a man who reminds me so much of Rolf Harris.”

Overheard Conversation No. 18

"Wow, your eyes are amazing. My name's Willy Wonka by the way, come over to my factory. Don't forget your Hershey's Kiss!! Aaaaaaah ha ha ha!!!"

Overheard Conversation No. 211

"Are you guys English?! I love English music; the Smiths, Morrissey, that guy's amazing."

"Yeah? Kind of depressing though."

"Naaah, it's not depressing. That stuff's fucking amazing! I like all that English music from the 80's; ABC..."

"The Cure?"

"The Cure, yeeeah."

Overheard Conversation No. 4

"Natasha! Natasha! How's England?!!"

"Errm... it's good."

"I've heard it's beautiful!!!!"

"It is. Have you been?"

"No."

"You should go."

"Do they have Prada?!!"

"Prada? Yeah."

"How much is it?!!"

"Umm... probably more than it is here."

"Okay, we won't go then! Thanks! Happy Birthday!"

Overheard Conversation No. 92

"Any more tea?"

"No, no more tea for us."

"You don't want any more tea do you?"

"No, no. No more tea. We don't want any more tea."

(Later)

"No thanks, we won't have any more tea."

Overheard Conversation No. 54

"This is the only place I know that'll charge you 20p to use the toilet."

Overheard Conversation No. 124

"That's a nice camera. I had one but it dropped in the water. You see that helicopter? That belongs to the New York Police Department. They can zoom in on any moving thing from two miles away. They can see us. They could see the screen on your camera."

"One of those ships sank, 70 people were hurt and 11 people died. It ripped like it had been opened with a can opener."

Overheard Conversation No. 193

Overheard Conversation No. 76

Costa Rica. November 2009

"Excuse me, can I ask you a question?"

"Err... yeah, okay."

"I've lost my telephone number... Can I have you?!!"